Nefarious gambler and anti-manure lobbyist Biff Tannen has announced plans to erect a twenty-eight floor hotel and casino in downtown Detroit. Tannen, famous for legalizing gambling in crime-ridden Hill Valley, will live in the casino’s penthouse with his wife, Lorraine, and stepson, Marty.

The hedonistic haven, named the Pleasure Paradise Hotel and Casino, will be a welcomed economic boost for Detroit, a city Tannen likens to his hometown of Hill Valley.

“Detroit has that same post-apocolyptic ambience that Hill Valley had back in ‘85,” said Tannen, adding that Hill Valley was “filled with crazed scientists and punk kids who wanted nothing more than to see [him] fail,” but that Detroit seemed to have “no signs of any scientists, or any intellectuals at all.”

“It was time for me to make like a tree and get out of there,” Tannen said with no sense of irony.

Tannen, who accumulated his fortune on a suspiciously lucky day at the race track, went on to state that his arrival would provide much needed employment opportunities for the once mighty Motor City.

“I’ll have to find some buttheads to wax my car,” Tannen scoffed. “Those two coats are not gonna wax themselves.”

While Tannen has been riding a hot gambling streak since the mid-50s, he did specify that when it comes to Detroit sports, he would never wager on the Lions.

“I have a good feeling they won’t ever win another game,” Tannen confidently stated after consulting a nearby “Ooh La La” magazine.